Television shows typically don't last too long these says, as with the sheer amount of shows that debut each year only a few typically get to make a second season. I am, personally, a big fan of shows that only ever lasted one season, but sometimes I need to bite the bullet and watch a TV show that lasted longer than one season.
After watching three episodes of this show last night, I feel that I am sufficiently informed to comment on this exciting new(-ish) TV show: Don't Trust the B---- in Apt. 23.
My first question is this: Why is bitch censored in the title? This is probably everybody's first question, but I think it's a legit point. It's 2012, and we're not allowed to put incredibly minor swear words in out television show titles? I don't know, it really irks me. And if you can't say bitch, then don't put it in the title! Change the name to something else! I'm docking points right from the start here. -10 points
The series begins with June moving to New York from somewhere. She has an exciting new job in... business and a sweet NYC apartment to go along with it. You see, the only important thing for everyone is to move to New York and make your life as much like Friends as possible. -5 points for setting it in a city that has been used so many times before. If you must set your show in the US, why not Pittsburgh? I don't know, I always had a soft spot for Pittsburgh.
But it all goes wrong for June, as her company has been closed down for corruption or something, and she now has no job or apartment (for some zany reason that only ever happens in TV shows). Stuck out in New York with no job or place to live, she decides to turn to Craigslist and find a roommate.
We get a hilarious montage of all the zany roommates that June could choose to live with (and, personally, I'd take the fat guy. He seemed entertaining), but eventually she decides to live with Chloe. This is unsurprising, as this characters face is all over the promos and whatnot. However, it turns out that not all is as at seems, as even though Chloe seems like a very nice girl, it turns out that she is really a BITCH WHO LIVES IN APARTMENT 23!
Oh, and there is also this woman who lives next door who is in love with Chloe or something. -3 points for being unable to feature an asian woman in a sitcom who is neither extremely bitter/sarcastic nor a total weirdo. Sorry, thems the breaks.
Anyway, it turns out that June lives in a world or lovable lunatics. Like every sitcom ever. There's the guy next door who watches them do stuff! Apparently he's a pervert or something, but he's too over the top to be realistic or entertaining. True perverts should be subtle. -5 points for being to OTT.
Okay, now here's another pet peeve. Why is there blurring? On a parody documentary show blurring makes sense, particularly if it's really over done (like the huge blue circle in Arrested Development), but on a regular sitcom it sort of undoes the pace. I don't know, I prefer fancy camera angles or well positioned flowers and whatnot. -10 points because I don't like the blurring (and it's not just because I'd like to see whats-her-faces nipples).
Oh, and it turns out that James Van Der Beek is in this show, playing HIMSELF! I don't actually know who James Van Der Beek is, but it turns out that he was on Dawson's Creek, a show that is a little old for me. Now, has the whole 'celebrities playing an exaggerated version of themselves' thing been overdone? It was good in Extras, but I'm not sure if we need it anymore. It's just a lazy attempt to make your show seem cool or edgy. -8 points
It turns out that Chloe's goal is to make June want to move out after taking her rent in advance. She does this by inviting her to foursomes and giving her masturbation tips. But June gets revenge on Chloe by selling all of her possessions. Yep, that's definitely a fair trade.
Some other crap happens, but I'm going to skip past it.
June is engaged (which I probably should've mentioned earlier) to a guy whose name I forget and is ultimately unimportant. I think he's a teacher or something, and he has a kid who follows him around and some other helper woman. I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention. Chloe gets the kid drunk and it is revealed that June's fiance is having an affair with the helper woman, the helper woman's sister and some other women as well. It's just like a soap opera.
In order to prove to June that her fiancee is cheating on her, she seduces the fiancee and they are about to have sex before June walks in. There's yelling and stuff and someone throws a lamp. June and Chloe have a heart to heart and we are set up for many more episodes of comedy with these two ladies.
Also, +2 points because I liked the multiple mistresses thing, +2 points because I like the slow kid with the glasses, but -5 points because the end scene was stupid and cheesy. And -5 points because I can't figure out Chloe's motivations.
MISC. THOUGHTS OF EPISODES TWO AND THREE
June has a life plan that includes being married by 26 and having two children, named Mary and Chris. Life plans NEVER work, you always end up disappointed. I think the straight man being a bit neurotic and being devoted to family is a bit overdone, personally. She's like a female Jason Bateman. -2 points
Chloe sets June up on a date with her father. I'll be honest, I liked that little twist. +3 points
James Van Der Beek runs his own acting workshop, but can't detach from being Dawson. The whole 'celebrity hates being known as that one character' thing is a little tired, but the JVDB subplots are usually the funniest bits of the episode, so I can't hate it too much. -3 points for being overused, but +5 points for being used well.
June works at a coffee shop with a guy who I have yet to mention. Good on him.
June is one of those sitcom characters who doesn't have sex for ages or uses euphemisms for genitalia and whatnot. Again, these characters are used too frequently and she isn't taken in any directions or whatever. Booooooring. -5 points
Chloe pushes her dad into a cyclist. I know I skipped ahead a lot, whatever. You don't want me to spoil everything, do you?
Chloe works for the UN or something. I liked the Tagalog reference. +1 point
Chloe adopts a child to be her assistant. Child labour laws be damned!
There's a bunch of story that is theme based, about June taking on too much responsibility and Chloe not taking on enough. I'm not sure what the moral is, but I'm that the characters will all quickly forget it in order for more hijinks to be raised next episode.
I actually like the assistant girl. I'm going to dock points for not including her as a main cast member. -10 points
Other stuff happens too, and James Van Der Beek is still the best character. +5 points for his scenes in episode 3.
So, that's it for my DTTBIA23 review. It managed to gain a handsome negative 53 points. That sounds bad, but the aim is really to lose as few points as possible. If I do anymore of these, we'll see how this show adds up. But overall I liked it. It's pretty formulaic and it doesn't really add anything new but it follows the guidelines pretty well. It's never going to be a classic but I didn't feel like I'd wasted time after watching it.
See ya.
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